TOTALLY INAPPROPRIATE.....but funny?

HELLLO BLOG...


NEVER NEVER LAND Weather Report:  Its definitely March, it will feel like spring and winter in a matter of seconds.....


I have experienced a few things these last few weeks that have been blog worthy.....but.....I have let the thought of certain individuals reading my blog keeping me from sharing.....specifically Queen Di.....and just people that have told me they read my blog around town....sometimes I start thinking about what I have written in the past and I find myself humiliated secretly in my own mind.....


But in the name of humor....I firmly believe in humiliating myself.....


Experience number one:


I experienced.....I am pretty sure for the first time....EVER.....a first person narrative from LEGS the other day.  Its significance was the exact point in time when LEGS decided to share his little story.......


We were uh.....making whoopi.  We were short on time. And...well....LEGS told me exactly what was occurring between us, EVERY. STEP. OF. THE. WAY. It was like "I am (blank). You are (blank).  And now, we are (blank).  


I was so surprised and shocked during this little story that I had no idea how to respond......except to burst out in laughter afterwards......


Experience number two:


On my birthday I received a proposition......


LEGS and I were in bed on our computers......


LEGS:"So uh babe.....?"
ARMS:"Yeah?"
LEGS:"Since its your birthday do you want me to do anything special?"
ARMS:"GIGGLES....TURN INTO LAUGHS....TURN INTO...."Are you propositioning me?"  More laughs...then I realized he was serious...."Um...No babe I'm good....but thank you..."


Experience number three:


Lost in translation.  


My new boxing Coach is Russian.  Its already hard enough understanding Germans, understanding a Russian that speaks german (I suspect with a Russian accent) is even harder.  Add in the severe language barrier...albeit I am learning very fast......and you have many misunderstandings.......


After hard training the other day he looked me square in the eye right in the face and said to me really seriously...


Coach:" Du Duschen? Du (this is the german word for "YOU!")  Duschen in the german word for "SHOWER"....
In my mind:  I thought the man asked me if I douch....I bursted out in laughter and then I wanted to slap him (for a spilt second) and then I realized what he actually said and felt like a complete fool....


Story number four:


So....I may be getting back in the ring over here in Europe, but its not a sure thing.  LEGS and I have been doing our research and ordering any gear or things I might need, since its a different country the rules are a little different.  


I hope that my readers realize what a unique thing that I am doing.  As a female, I have immersed myself in a German boxing gym, and I have a Russian Coach.....my experience so far has been really interesting and eye opening.  They SEEM to support and accept female boxing a little better than in the United Sates.....


Anyway.....I watched a female match the other night and it was completely different than the fighting you see between females in the states....but I did notice a peculiarity.....


It seems as though I have to order "chest protector"  in order to compete.  I have seen a few girls wear them, but I have always found them to be frivolous and stupid looking.....


Watching the coach describe to our little translator in the gym what he means by chest protector and me responding with "That is stupid- do I have to wear it?"  was entertaining.....


I realize that these were TOTALLY INAPPROPRIATE but they were funny right?


Feel free to humiliate me some more by sharing this with all of your friends.....oh yeah and totally bring it up to me in public!  GIGGLES....


Random Thoughts:


I just can't believe LEGS is leaving.....its been a really emotional few days for me......




LEGS...I wish I could record the sound of your heart.....and when your gone......play it OVER and OVER again while I fall asleep......




I shudder at returning to the days where a hot bath....is the closet thing I can get to your arms around me.......

Just another day....in the life...of an..UNLIKELY...MILITARY.....WIFE.....**