Well.....Hello...Blog...
Weather: I see trees of green, red roses too, I see them bloom for me and you, And I think to myself, what a wonderful world, I see skies of blue and clouds of white, The bright blessed day, the dark sacred night, And I think to myself, what a wonderful world....
Exchange Rate: Same
I planted my LAST flower bed. In it I put; Dahlia's, Sunflowers, Grandpa Ott's Morning Glory, Zinnia's, Black Roses, Daisies, Forget Me Not's, Cosmos, Sweet Pea's, Susanne, Summer Aster, and Stroh Blume (German).
Gardening is adventurous....just in case you didn't know.....
Its dangerous, beautiful, exciting, difficult, and hopefully there is a happy ending....but right now I am where the plot thickens, and your not sure if the bad guy or the good guy is going to prevail!
I was wishing yesterday that I had purchased more flowers that are already alive and grown to put into the ground. But as I planted the flower seeds today, I started to get excited about seeing what happens...I put in all this hard work, spent all day sweating, bent over, digging, and planting, just to look at soil....and hold my breath.....
.............................................................................................................
................................(gasp)whoops I forgot to breath......and wait.....patiently wait to see what I have created............the suspense is killing me!
I was just finishing planting the flower bed when I got a text from LEGS:
'On the bus on my way to your arms 143.'
HOLY MOLY Batman! In preparation of The Homecoming I had to break it off with the MilkMan, hide any evidence of bad behavior, clean, thaw chicken, give Karmella a bath, and Primp like a 1950's wife.
Mission Accomplished: Was able to finish all my laundry in preparation of the incoming LOADS, Water the Garden, Bathe Karmella, Bathe myself, Primp and Look HOT when I picked up My LEGS. Thaw chicken, and make a healthy dinner LEGS likes. Make Whoopi. And now he is fast asleep....next to me...SNORING.....COLOSSAL SMILE on MY FACE....
As I sit here in my bed, typing on my laptop, I take great peace in knowing that Daddy's have been reunited with their children, Husbands are making love to their Wives, and Soldiers are getting a restful night's sleep after a month in the field. It makes me smile and even giggle knowing that people are making WHOOPI all over Franconia right now....
But with all this happiness, I have not forgot and how could I? That:
"People sleep peaceably in their beds at night only because rough men stand ready to do violence on their behalf." -George Orwell
Which means....there are children missing their fathers and mothers, and wives are laying in their empty beds tonight saying a prayer their husbands will make it home safely.
Apparently I need to stir the pot more often in my blog. I have had more page views on my blog today then I have ever had. I guess when you say something may be controversial people want to read about it- Go figure.
But seriously......
I hurt people's feelings and that is not my style. So I would like to apologize for offending, hurting, or discouraging anybody.
A friend of mine posted this shortly after I posted the controversial blog, it made me feel better about what I did, and I think its a great quote!
Here is the long and short of it. 3 of my friends, started a blog within one week. It got under my skin a little....so I threw a fit...(because I didn't have LEGS)...thought long and hard..(after seeking and receiving outside advice)...wrote a blog about being an individual...(because it was honestly how I was feeling)...regretted writing it...(because I was going to offend people that I like)...wrote another blog about being obviously lost...(because after the first blog I felt like I was lost)....
And now I am here. I have found myself, for now. This is the real me.
I spent the entire day in the garden, listening to country music, and thinking how dumb I am. SO this blog is about how I am dumb.
ARMS' Mailbox:
I made a public request on facebook, that if I had offended anybody, coudl they please write me and tell me why. Here is excerpts of messages I received.
ARMS,
I was just a little disappointed that you could not come talk to me. My intention is never to make you feel smothered or freaked out!! I'm sorry if I made you feel that way. If it makes you uncomfortable I can stop with the Blog it just does not mean THAT much to me, just thought it would be a fun thing for me and my family back home. We like you, your a fun positive person to be around! I'm sorry I you feel like you can't come talk to me, I should be a better friend to you!
Dear J LO,
I should have come talk to you. I don't want to disappoint you- (FYI-I know that this is a "Mom" move .*) ) Now I feel horrible- it works! I don't want you to stop the blog, in fact if you do I will never talk to you again. I operate better when I can write my feelings, so unless its something that is really personal, I write about my feelings in the blog. Its a coping mechanism for me that is why I nickname everybody- to keep their identities private. I am in the wrong, instead of being a HATER, I should have taken the high road and encouraged you! So, I am sorry, I am dumb.
Love on ya, ARMS
ARMS,
It came off like you were coming down on the moms that stay at home. If you were I can see your point. As a mom I feel like I don't do any of my old hobbies.
Your blog gave me a great opportunity to reflect on who I am and if I'm the person I want to be.
What worries me is that you might have alienated some of the women over there and then they whine to their husbands who then talk to LEGS and then your military social life is affected. Then again maybe not. WOmen can be evil plain and simple so hopefully nothing negative will come from it. And you said what you felt which is hard to do in such a way that gets your feelings out without hurting others.
Dear Reader:
I wasn't coming down on stay at home Mom's, and I am sorry if it came off that way. I think being a mother is one of the most amazing roles/jobs in the whole wide world!!! One that I am sadly not in a position to possess or enjoy at this time. I do sometimes think that stay at home Mom's forget who they are, and it frustrates me because just because you are a mom doesn't mean you have to give up your whole identity. I really think you can have it all....if you want!
I hope that my blog made your reflection positive, I only wanted to inspire people to do amazing things with their talents, and since I know you personally I KNOW that you are talented and special despite your doubts, I would say that I think you need to do more for yourself! (like take a spa get a way to NEVER NEVER LAND!)
As far as my blog coming back to bite me in the derriere, I think its going to be okay....this time....I need to be more careful....but I do hope that I am allowed to have my feelings and write about them without negative backlash....
Love on ya, ARMS**
ARMS,
When you start to feel over whelmed by it all, just know, I'm here for you. I've been there and done that. Probably a lot longer than some of the others you might know. It is a tough load to bare, but it's ours, just like the guys have theirs. Love ya girl!
Dear Reader,
Thank you for your loyal and genuine support!
Love on ya, ARMS**
After all of this, I have relished in the fact that people I am honored to call my friends were willing and able to tell me why they were offended. I RESPECT, ADORE and more importantly UNDERSTAND them so much better. And I learned more about myself. Mostly that I am dumb....
Upon reflection:
I read my blog to LEGS last night. He said he thought that the one where I may have offended people was really, really good. He did say he would have dissuaded me from writing it in the first place, but then I wouldn't have accomplished what I accomplished, which was a deeper relationship with my family over here in NEVER NEVER LAND, and hopefully more readers.
Perhaps I should have shared my feelings more privately, but then I think.....it would have sounded awful, and I am quite sure that my point would have been lost in my inability to complete a thought, sentence, or conversation without getting nervous or scattered.....
And that got me thinking.....is blogging, writing, emailing, facebooking, talking on the telephone, texting a acceptable form of communication??? Am I really being immature by talking about my issues on the blog?? Its real easy for me to hide behind my computer and technology....
Yes! It is acceptable and this is why. In previous WARS, there was no skype, telephone, television, facebook, internet, email, etc., all that was available was regular old mail. People based marriages, love, and relationships all on letters they would receive.
When LEGS was Recon, he couldn't call me everyday, because he was out in the field....in a war zone. I wrote to him EVERY SINGLE DAY the ENTIRE time he was deployed except Sunday's. And I still have EVERY SINGLE LETTER to prove it. I got really good at extricating my feelings by writing them down. And I don't hide behind the technology, I give everybody a chance to share their feelings and even publicly admit fault, apologize and share what others said.
The only thing that I would change about my actions....is....I would have taken the high road. I HATE HATERS, and I was one. Instead of throwing a fit I should have encouraged my friends to pursue their hobbies. I realize and accept now that I am in a leadership position, and I am ready for the challenge. Instead of alienating and castrating my friends, I need to be encouraging, be compassionate, and enthusiastic.
Guilty Pleasures:
I made WHOOPI with LEGS.
Random Thoughts:
Sometimes when I get dressed in my clothes I think that I look like a kid.....
I waved at somebody today, and despite doing p90x my arm was too jiggly for me....
(heavy sigh) I am lucky....so lucky....
I can't believe this is my garden its like out of a dream......
When I saw J Lo's face today at the husband pick up point, after all this blog drama, I wanted to run up and hug her instead of my LEGS, because I was so relieved she wasn't mad at me, and also, I have a new found respect and admiration for her......but I didn't....because she would have thought I really am the weird girl.....
OVER & OUT
Just another day in the life of an unlikely military wife.....**
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