Weather Chronicles brought to you by my little Velociraptor, Karmella: Its windy, chilly and cloudy. 1 Euro equals $1.48 American. :(
Special Edition: 1 Week ARMS without LEGS.....
Princess Peach has not been feeling well for awhile now. She has been having trouble breathing. The doctor's have been running tests on her to figure out what is wrong. Yesterday I accompanied her to a Pulmonary Specialist in Wurzberg, so I had to get up really early.
When I woke up, I turned on the news and saw that Osama Bin Laden had been found and killed. My heart started pounding in my chest, a big cheesy grin came across my face and I experienced pride and joy in my soul. I felt so proud of LEGS and his service, and I felt like all the pain, heartache, sacrifice and loss we have experienced over the years was ALMOST worth it.
Princess Peach and I commuted to the appointment in Wurzberg, unfortunately we had to walk a long distance to the Doctor's office in the big hospital there. I felt stupid limping.....Once we got to the office the receptionist barely spoke or understood English. I was glad that I was there because Princess Peach was understandably nervous, and I was able to assist with the small amount of GERMAN I know in getting all the basic information sorted out.
We received good news at the Doctor's office, Princess Peach does not appear to have a lung disease. This is where everybody needs to be empathetic and sympathetic to the hardships of being a military wife. The boys are away, so the wives support each other in nontraditional fashion. Yesterday my role, was to help Princess Peach just as her husband would. It was uplifting to see Princess Peach relieved of medical stress, and I felt like for the first time I saw her true spirit and personality yesterday.
After the appointment, we discussed the absolutely catastrophic affects that stress and anxiety can have on a person. It can physically alter a person's condition and literally eclipse a person's personality, spirit, and true emotions. Add on top of this the isolation that military wives experience and it makes it disastrous to a person's health and well being.
After the appointment Princess Peach bought me lunch, and assisted me in a few errands on base and at home. Even though I don't like asking, requiring or accepting help, it was nice to chat about every day normal things and I was able to get things done much faster.....it was like one of my sisters hanging out with me while I did basic chores, and it felt good.
Karmella got out of the yard again yesterday. I limp-chased her into one of these large compost piles the farmers have in the fields around here- pretty nasty stuff.....and then she disappeared.....I went back to the house and got in the truck....drove around and found her. The shock collar grabbed her attention and then scared her into my arms.....
I am pretty sure everybody who reads my blog and all my friends and family think that I am absolutely insane for running after this dog so much. So let me clarify my situation, even though I agree I AM CRAZY, PSYCHO in fact. The fences here in NEVER NEVER LAND are not like fences in America. They are usually constructed of chicken wire or wood, and covered in thick hedges.....and they are shorter.
So......finding how Karmella is escaping is really difficult. Second, Karmella slips and chews off her harness all the time, so tying her up isn't always affective. And last but not least. I need the dog. I am lonely and alone if I don't have the dog. She provides me with the well being necessary when LEGS is gone for long periods of time to operate and function like a normal human being.
I will say I find it amusing that the dog hates me so much that she runs away from me and is always trying to escape. I feel like a crazy ex-girlfriend that won't give the relationship up....
Today, I vow to be a better pet owner, part of the problem is I have neglected my dog. I will walk Karmella every single day, and I will spend hours looking for her escape route. And just like a crazy ex-girlfriend I will smother her with love....
Last night, I was emotionally and mentally drained.....I have spent so much time lately giving to others that I really haven't taken care of myself. I decided to turn off my computer, disconnect my phone, and shut my blinds.
I took my very first hot bath, in my large European bath tub in my new house in NEVER NEVER LAND. Then, in total seclusion and silence I spent some time knitting my niece Rylee's blanket. As I sat there knitting I started thinking....
I started to relive and reminisce over September 11, 2001, June of 2002 when I met LEGS, the deployments, friends that we have lost, deployments, fear, nightmares, stress, and sadness that Osama Bin Laden in personally responsible for.
I know some people have said, that they will not celebrate death, even their enemies death, but unfortunately after everything I have been through I am not afforded that luxury.
I have been personally terrorized with nightmares, heartache, fear, loss and sacrifice over that man's actions FOR YEARS!!! We have lost friends, seen widows suffer, children grow up without fathers, we have put our relationship, our wedding, and our life on hold to participate in the effort to find him and his counterparts......
I have watched LEGS turn from a trusting, carefree boy, into a cautious, jaded man, I have watched his family worry, and struggle while he is away, I have watched my family try to console me, and support me while he is away....
I have aged, wrinkled, and stressed my young years away. I have been held hostage to the news, and my telephone. Attended a University that had no empathy or understanding of my significant others mission, put my engagement, wedding and marriage aside, and I have followed LEGS into an ACTIVE life of being in the military, due to his guilt of watching others serve and not serving himself.......
There is a lump in my throat as I write this......the message that we sent all over the world yesterday- is it doesn't matter how long, it doesn't matter how hard, and it doesn't matter how much....if you hurt us.....we will find you. SEMPER FIDELIS. ALWAYS FAITHFUL.
So.....I won't apologize for celebrating the death of EVIL. I won't justify, or entertain any of the other bullsh*t I have seen on facebook, the news, or from people, because the bottom line is this......I know for a fact, those people have not been as INVOLVED as I have been in this effort and accomplishment. My only request is that they show a little compassion and respect to those of us who have.....
Guilty Pleasures:
A LARGE glass of red wine
Some flaming hot cheetos, and a cupcake.
Being selfish.
Random Thoughts:
JEEZ.....people are nuts...
Some of the people in this office are really really sick.....that makes me sad.
I cannot believe I am friends with some of these people on facebook, how disrespectful to me.....
Is is weird that I like to be alone so much?
I am missing LEGS....I miss his touch.....
OVER & OUT
Just another HISTORIC day in the life of an unlikely military wife......**
Tiff I appreciate all you and your husband and any service member/family have and are sacrificing. You have such a refreshing honesty I your posts <3
ReplyDeleteOh Tiffany, I'm sorry you have to see all these ridiculous ideas people go throwing around on FB w/out stopping to think about their words. I agree with you whole heartedly and I think you should be able to celebrate. I also feel like people jump to the conclusion that everyone is just celebrating his death, when in reality we're celebrating the accomplishment of a mission America set out to do and in turn justice has been served. If we had captured him alive we would still be celebrating, so no one should be twisting the celebration into something sadistic. I say have your moment now, and I can't wait to be there and celebrate with you!
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