0512/1312
Day 5 & 6
A LETTER
When I DARE to be POWERFUL, to use MY STRENGTH in the service of MY VISION, it becomes less and less important whether I am AFRAID. -Audrey Lorde
I am surrounded by AMAZING women.....they all inspire me so much and they don't even know it......I am blessed with a beautiful, talented, smart and resourceful group of women who march along aside me during this difficult time.....My BELOVED ROSIE GIRLZ.....WE CAN DO IT!
Although my letters to you have been sad, I do not want you to fret my darling.....I have some really awesome people in my life....
Looking down the pike at the beginning of a deployment can be so incredibly disheartening......this week I have felt absolutely defeated, like every single second, minute, day just slowly crawls by.....I have felt like I can handle it and then I have been robbed of that confidence......
I don't like these feelings.....that phone calls, circumstances, minutes and hours spent alone, or times when I am surrounded by people but still feel alone.....I need some control over my life....
I haven't cooked......not a god damn thing all week......
I have eaten only junk.....and even when I bring myself to eat junk, I feel like if I eat it I am going to throw up......I think that the stress of having you gone is manifesting itself in my eating habits.....I need to remedy this quickly because I want to be a strong athlete....
Since you have been gone I have struggled with normal every day operations.....I need more structure to my life....my sleep, my bed, my diet, the hours I have been keeping, its all been very random and unorganized......What better reason to get my life together than for you?
There has been this idea circulating around about this program....called "RUN TO YOUR SOLDIER"......
So....I did the math. Oberdachstetten, Germany to Where you are is approximately 3, 145.7 miles. And while the idea of literally running all those miles is a feat that I would very much like to accomplish its not realistic for me to run 17 miles per day.
In direct conjunction with my goals....I created a LIST of things that I could do to earn mileage.
Here is my purposed Mileage List. I am submitting it to you for approval. You know me the best, you will keep me honest.....
| Activity | Purposed Miles |
| Actual Milage (bike or run) | |
| Boxing Class | 1 |
| Boxing Camp | 5 |
| Boxing Match | 5 |
| Blogging/Packages to you... | 1 |
| ADVOCARE Diet | 1 |
| Sleep (adult sleep hours and 7 hours per night) | 1 |
| 1 hour of Knitting | 1 |
| 30 minutes of German | 1 |
| Navigating/Travel | 2 |
| Outdoor Work | 1 |
| Garden/Canning | 1 |
| Active Advocare Work | 1 |
| Training/Walking/Caring for Karmella | 1 |
| 1 hour of Reading | 1 |
| ROSIE Work (FRG, Favors, Helping) | 1 |
| Being Punctual | 1 |
| Spending 1 day a week Relaxing | 2 |
| Being Strong When I feel I can't. | 1 |
* We can always add or subtract things...(I am hoping to subtract some of the more basic routine goals with some more tangible goals once I get it together enough to do so)...but I thought very hard about some of the things that I put on there.....
I am also hoping that my plan will inspire family members and friends to support you by doing positive healthy things for miles.....
I want to run to you......
LOVE ON YA- BIRDIE**
Just another day in the life of an unlikely military wife....**
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