Beloved LEGS....
....I won't forget, the way I felt, laying in the pale, gray, twilight of the mornings dusk, on the day you left.....I laid there and my bones felt so heavy...the energy required to rise from our bed was what seemed an impossible feat.....
....the house was starting to become empty....the house was becoming a hollow place that stored belongings that no longer meant anything to me....and no amount of previous life experience....physical, emotional or mental training could prepare me.....could give me the tools, necessary, to handle sending you, you who my soul loves, that much....to WAR....
....the night prior I convinced you to take a bath with me....my eyes thirstily drank you in....the peace you seemed to possess, like a child or cherub gave my soul absolute euphoria......and washing your mortal body....feeling your skin and the life in your body.....both filled to the brim, my heart and collapsed it at the same time......I could NOT HELP BUT THINK.....what if you do not return like you are in this moment?
....I often wonder if you feel the same way or have the same questions.....the day you leave I feel a bizarre sort of amped....heart beats irregular, stomach flips and flops, the frailty robs me of all my strength....and still I cannot believe that my feet are moving, that I am helping you load and pack, that I am actually driving the vehicle to deliver you....
....I pray for divine intervention....a debilitating care accident, a catastrophic event.....a sudden pardon....from the people that make these decisions......
....it occurs to me....that despite the years we have been doing this, the previous deployments, having my health, and the stress of boxing means absolutely nothing......
I am not significant or special.....I am exactly like all the others around us.......
....Just another day in the life of an unlikely military wife......**
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