Life Flashes Before Your Eyes....**: Alabama HOARDERS and a Redneck ShinDig......**

HOWDY BLOGGER!

My Weather Story Continues: Shunshine and Brrrrrrr!!!!

Yesterday our house was descended upon by Locusts. At 6:45 am 20 cars rolled up for our Garage Sale. LEGS and ARMS scrambled to set up the items to be sold. LEGS hopped into his car to go hang up another sign. As soon as he departed folks climbed out of their cars and hiked up into our driveway.

It was like a scene from a Tim Burton movie. It appeared as though they were all from a traveling circus, limping up the driveway, with crazy faces and bizarre clothes, bad teeth, pungent odors, and a rabid look in their eye.

I felt like I was an Auctioneer, lots of people were picking things up and asking me prices, they were rooting around in the garage, asking me how much for things that weren't even on sale. I panicked and sold a $200 dollar portable DVD player for $8. All I could do was desperately tell these scavengers to wait until LEGS returns to ask him about the prices of items.

People were aggressively asking us if we had any guns, ammo, gold or silver coins, gold or silver jewelery, any knives for sale.....

They all seemed to know each other, they were asking about each others health, kids, etc. They were shaking hands and informing each other about good deals we had. One guys said, we are 'junkers' around here. They were heading off to buy storage units. Some people left and then returned, some insulted items that we had for sale, some manipulated, some dismissed our prices and items and left.

One lady told me all about her lung cancer. 23 treatments of chemo, 33 treatments of radiation, a partial lung extraction, and a lymph nod extraction. Moral of the story: Lung Cancer is real. She obtained it by smoking ciggarettes. Quit Smoking because I love you.

Many were curious about us. They asked about Alaska. They Thanked LEGS for his service. They asked where we were headed. They wished us well.

I watched LEGS greedily count his bank roll over and over yesterday with dollar signs for pupils.

After this bizarre garage sale experience we took the items we could not sell to Good Will. Many people were in the Good Will store, scavenging for cheap items, they all starred at LEGS and I like we were out of place. The show 'Hoarders' came to mind.

A wave of sadness and exhaustion came over me. I didn't know how to feel. Should I pity these people? Should I feel sad? Or is this just how they roll? Never in my life have I needed to behave in such a manner to obtain items that I need. Are these things people needed or did they just want them? LEGS and ARMS retired for a nap. I slept for 4.5 hours.

Luckily we ended the night at Jethro's house. The Christmas Tree bonfire, HOG, Squirrel and other delicacies were an undeniable, knee slappin', hootin' and hollerin' of a good time. I was reunited with my girlfriends, we met new friends, drank beer, drank wine, ate amazing food, and I was deemed the 'baby whisperer.' One of the babies wouldn't fall asleep so I took the little nugget and vibrated him to sleep.

I wore my Pabst Blue Ribbon Trucker hat over to complete my redneck costume. People offered me money for it all night, but I gave it to Jethro for FREE. He is heading to WAR, and I want him to have this sentimental item of mine. I know it means a lot to him, but it means even more to me, that these amazing men I am honored to know in my life are pleased as punch over a hat and yet carry such a heavy burden of maintaining our freedom.

Random Thoughts:

For the record, this is the longest that I have not had my nail polish on my toes. I have neglected myself due to the obscene number of things I have to achieve. Since I was old enough to master motor skills enough to paint my toes I have had paint on them.

WOW......just WOW.......

LEGS still has not completed his mission to roll all the spare change I have accumulated. He has been furiously going through all the places in the house searching for more spare change. And bringing it back to the 'rolling room.' This is all too reminiscent of the days when as kids we would return to the table at Chuck E. Cheese ONLY to get tokens.

Seriously lady, you want to give me a few dollars for a $160 carpet shampooer?

OMIGOD LEGS PLEASE HURRY BACK!!!

This is for real.....this is really happening........

SOME military wives really entertain my brain. I can't help but giggle and gaggle over their astonishing ability to retreat to the days of high school and behave like Alicia Silverstone in the movie 'Clueless.' Thank you ladies for giving me something incredibly thrilling to observe.

For the record: Squirrel isn't bad. It tastes like chicken, but its a very dense, tough meat. You should try everything at least once in your life.