A VERY HaPpY BiRtHdAy MeGuN the RaYgUn **

24 years ago today, something happened in my life.  I did not understand what was happening at the time, because I was only 3 years old, but if I would have known then what I know now- I would have been celebrating my a** off!!! 

On Tuesday, October 29th 1986 my little sister Megan was born.  She also goes by Schmegan, Megun the Raygun, Megs, Nutmeg, Blueberries and Cream, Minnie Mouse, and Cinderella.  My Mommy was terrified of having a child on Halloween so she had the doctor induce her and Megan was born.  My Daddy used to call her Blueberries and Cream because she has the biggest bluest eyes with the longest prettiest eyelashes ever!!!  

I have a few memories of her being younger, I remember she used to take all of the stuff out of Grandpa McKay's pocket (which is a lot of stuff) while he was sleeping, I remember having Oatmeal with her and my sister Rachel at the kitchen table in the mornings, I remember she was obsessed with the movie E.T., to the point where we could not watch anything else for MONTHS!!!  

She has always been very brave- she cut her hair really short when the rest of us wouldn't have dared, she wanted to water ski when the rest of us were frightened, and she moved to Norway with my Daddy when the rest of us were Chicken Sh*t. 

We aren't going to discuss what happened when she was a teenager- first I don't want to spill the beans to the Parental Units on some stuff that I know about and lets just say I hated her guts- to put it VERY lightly.

I don't know how it changed, or when it changed, or why it changed, but I find that today she is one of my most faithful friends, supreme confidants, and my co-conspirator.  She is fun, funny and fun loving, clever, manipulative, sophisticated, she is drop dead gorgeous, mischievous, smart, intense, and classy.  She loves fashion, and pretty things, and she always looks smokin' hot.   She loves cocktails, dancing and is always the life of the party. 

She is my mirror shining back at me, a world of possibilities.  She is my witness, who see's me at my worst and best, and loves me anyway.  She is my partner in crime, my midnight companion (she is afraid of earthquakes), someone who knows when I'm smiling-even in the dark. She is my teacher (she taught me how to dance- so if I look like a ruh-tard its her fault!! :D), my defense attorney, my personal press agent, my fashion sense, even my shrink.  Some days........she is the reason I wish I was the only child. -Barbara Alpert

Megs- "You can't think how I depend on you, when you're not there the color goes out of my life." Virginia Woolfe to her sister.  

You have inspired me to be more feminine, to know what I am signing, to let my hair down, walk on the wild side and laugh often!!! I miss you so much sissy, and I hope you have a wonderful birthday!!! Love on ya and sparkles************* BS***********************************

Jazz up your Spaghetti

Today I made spaghetti and decided to use this Basil Roasted Tomatoes recipe from my good friend Jena "Longshanks" Wright-  to jazz it up a bit.

Basil Roasted Tomatoes

8-10 Roma Tomatoes, I slice them in half, remove pulp, then dice them

2-3 cloves of garlic, minced

6-10 fresh basil leaves, chopped tiny, (or about a tbsp dried)

olive oil (enough to coat everything)

salt and pepper

Mix all ingredients and roast in a bowl or dish at 250 for about 2 hours.  This time and temp varies drastically, the recipe is very forgiving, if I'm in a hurry I've put them in at 350 for 45 minutes, roasting them longer just brings out the flavor better.  

 

They were delicious out of the oven, unfortunately LEGS had to leave for his night flight before we could enjoy the spaghetti.  The sauce is currently simmering down on the stove.  So CHEERS! To a Midnight Spaghetti Rendezvous!!! Hubba Hubba!!! .*)

 

Before:

After:

Downward facing dog.....**

I recently started doing yoga......hey.....DON'T judge me- I will CUT you.......I know, I know-how could I go from boxing to yoga!?! They are like two polar opposites right??? Well...the only reason I was even open to it in the first place was because it is part of the P90x program.  P90x is NO JOKE- its a serious-beast like workout.

The first time I did it- I was lost, confused, and I basically thought it was stupid.  But the willfulness in me wanted to "understand" it because.....I didn't get it......AT ALL.

I did the P90x session a second time, this time with LEGS, it was fun and amusing to do it with a partner- I was stronger at some things, he was better at others- we laughed at each other and had a great time.  ( I will also admit- watching my long legged husband do some of the exercises was like stand up comedy LIVE!)

The third time I did it I was grumpy and tired- but I told myself just turn the session on and get through a half hour of it.  It was amazing!!! I felt like I took a 3 hour nap and had a cup of coffee!!! I felt revived and was able to get so much more done then I would have if I hadn't done the yoga.


I started to feel less like a clown in the movements and decided to do a formal class.  Yeah- your right- I don't do anything unless I look cool doing it.  I have taken three formal yoga classes and I think I am hooked. 


I used to believe Yoga was a silly way for people to "work out", kind of like the silliness of men in Ballet.  But once you try it- you realize its not silly its actually serious and it kicks your a**.  Then I started to look around- none of the people who do yoga are fat, and now I know why.  I cannot believe how much stronger, flexible and livelier I feel now that I have started doing yoga.  In fact- I wish I would have been doing it while I was boxing because I really think it would have helped strengthen the stamina in my legs. 

They say to let go of judgment and competition but, every time I go its like a little war with myself - how much further can I go, how much more can I stand.  Also, they tell you to only focus on the present moment- I have to admit that I have thought about things that are bothering me in there- but when I leave Yoga its like EUREKA!!! I  have the answer to my problem or I just know everything is going to work out- its priceless!!!  The other day I wore some body spray that I haven't worn in a long time- (you know they say smell is the one sense most tied to memory) the whole time I was taken back to the past- thinking about where I was, who I was with, what I was doing, and how far I have come- it was the best reflection I have ever experienced.


AND its fun.  The instructor says to breath in and out through your nose- but breathing out my deviated septum is impossible so I am definitely the mouth breather girl in yoga class.  I also suck at the balance exercises- which means I'm the floppy girl giggling at herself in the back of the room.  And in two of the classes I have been to-somebody has done the flatulence release pose which was nothing short of hysterical!!!


But the best reason to go to Yoga is the relaxation part at the end of class.  Its a meditation period, where the instructor guides you through a period of clearing your mind, relaxing your body and focusing on yourself.  I think this part of the class is invaluable- after I get done with yoga I feel like I could take on the world and anything that stands in my way.


I challenge you to take 3 classes- get back to me.........**

The Divorce Room....**

Since LEGS and I have been together it has been a very long challenging road as far as his cleaning/organizational skills are concerned......The first time I asked him to clean the bathroom he was using the toilet brush to clean everything.......FOR REAL!!!  Today.....81/2 years later he has made very big improvements and has developed into a more socialized companion.  

We still have a few issues that need to be worked out and I am hoping an overseas move will demonstrate why being organized and clean are so important.  One issue is the garage which- I had to clean and organize back in Alaska (it was like special education- I will admit I had no idea what more than half his sh*t is!)-but am firmly refusing to do here- since there are things crawling around in that garage that I do not have the capacity or expertise to deal with.  

The second issue we have is THE DIVORCE ROOM.  The DIVORCE ROOM is LEGS' room in the house, it looks like the ARMY, the Marines, Lance Armstrong, a Gun Fanatic, and avid Outdoors man threw up in it.  Since this is part of the inside of the house- I have tried a range of experiments to keep it clean.  First was giving him a clean slate- by cleaning and organizing it in the first place and then begging him to keep it nice.  The second one was making him clean it, the third was helping him clean it, and NOW it is NOT letting him in it.......do you think this will work??? If it doesn't I fear I will burn the house DOWN!!!

I am feeling a lot better today.  I got the DIVORCE ROOM clean and ready to pack, which means I have half the house ready. I have spoken to several people who lived in Germany about my Tank and my Boo Boo Karmella.  They said just take them- it won't hurt anything.  I told LEG's last night that I don't mind selling the FJ if that's what he wants to do.  At the end of the day I just want LEGS and ARMS to be HaPPy in Germany.  

One of the people I spoke to about it was Jason, Flora's husband.  He is a real cool dude, funny as hell!!! He was so helpful and encouraging.  He calmed a lot of my anxieties and was a hero to me today.  Sometimes I am so amazed at how wonderful, kind and generous your friends in the military can be.......It makes me so proud to be part of this. **

 

Tank Girl without her Tank!?!**

LEGS when to his brief yesterday where they give you information about what to start doing and what you have to do in order to move to GERMANY.  I am taking this all in stride as best I can but it is very complicated.  
First, I have to join this program called Army Community Service Exceptional Family Member Program "EFMP" you know the Army and their damn acronyms.....Its a group that decides if specific medical/special education needs can be met at the location we are traveling too.  The reason I have to sign up is because of my Asthma and my Thyroid Disorder- curse them both to HELL!!!  And I have to get a physical........I am sure everything will be fine- but in the back of my mind- I worry that they will tell me I can't go.  I try really hard not to ever let these things hold me back but sometimes they do- and denial doesn't cut it.
Reading some of the guide lines they give you has us also debating weather or not to take the FJ.  I love that truck, its my tank- what is tank girl without her tank???  They indicate that if your vehicle is too wide or long they advise not to bring it.   The FJ is wide, but.........everybody we have talked to said it would be fine.  Personally I think LEGS wants his dream car the Audi and that is why he is even more unsure weather or not to take the FJ.  It is hard, we are already giving up two dogs to go.  Maybe I am focusing too much on the small things, but my car to me is independence.........

They also say that they don't have built in closets over there- you use armoires.......I look at my closet and at LEGS's closet and that seems like a nightmare to me.  We went through some of his clothes today.....I wish I was exaggerating but the man has 500 T-Shirts!!!! Its ridiculous!!! If somebody buys him another T-Shirt I am going to commit suicide!!! I wonder what people do over there- do they just have clothes strewn all over their house???
LEGS may have to go before me too.  We were really hoping to travel together but, it might be hard for us to find a place EVEN with JUST Karmella.  We are really going to try to get out of this house by January- but that is pretty aggressive since we don't have his official orders yet.  We are just trying to save money wherever we can and it would be cheaper to rent a crappy apartment until we can get everything including me and Karmella over there.  The other benefit to moving our things early is getting them sooner- they said it can take months to get your things- so we may be roughing it for an extended period of time.  I have to say that I do kindive like this idea of living on the bare minimum with the bare minimum- its what makes this a REAL LIFE ADVENTURE!!!! And it also makes you thankful for the luxuries so many of us take for granted......
I know I seem a little more melancholy today- I'm not sad I'm just focused.  One of our friends is getting stationed in Korea.  They aren't allowing any family to accompany them right now- so he might have to leave his wife and brand new baby daughter behind for 6 months or more.  
Just another day in the life of an unlikely military wife.................**

Got my curves back!!! .*)

I finally....... got my curves back....Shazam!!!

I noticed it yesterday when I slid on a pair of jean shorts and they hugged my derriere instead of hanging off and looking like I sh*t my pants.  Usually, I would be horrified, quickly taking off the shorts stepping on the scale and gearing up for a run.......but a big smile spread across my face and the song "Baby's got her blue jeans on" by Mel McDaniel replayed over and over in my head.

When I was competitively boxing my weight was everything.  I had to be conscious of every single thing I put into my mouth- I even had to be careful how much water I drank!!! I would get up every morning and run three miles in a sauna suit- IN ALABAMA-IN THE SUMMER- then I would go to my regular boxing workout sometimes two times a day-which was very grueling as well.  I felt like I was in a concentration camp, with hardly enough food and very little water to keep functioning at times....It was an interesting experiment to see how little I could function on, it was also interesting how it effected my mood, although I cannot say that LEGS found it that interesting LOLZ....

I would get on the scale all the time, when I got up, before I ate, after I ate, before I went to practice, after I got home from practice, before I went to bed......and this is all part of being in a weight managed sport......If I had it to do all over again I am not sure what I would do because I am in the middle of two weight classes and giving up weight is probably worse than losing water weight......its just tough maintaining the same weight for an entire week for a tournament......when you get out of tournament you eat like you just got out of boot camp- EVERYTHING THAT YOU HAVE DAYDREAMED ABOUT!!!!


Anyways........even after I decided to take a break from competition- I had a hard time breaking some of the habits that I had become so religious about.  I would still check my weight often and kill myself until I was satisfied with the number on the scale.  After awhile it started to scare me- why was I so obsessed with my weight when I didn't need to be? I even took my scale on vacation to Alaska with me!!!!..... I needed to find balance in my life again.

I eat pretty much whatever I want.....which is nice.  But I workout pretty hard everyday so that I can be liberal with my diet.  Like  "The Situation" says- "if you want to look good you gotta go to the gym." I try to eat healthy too, but I enjoy myself with more than just fruits, vegetables, protein, and water.  I eat carbs, I revel in dessert, and I have a few drinks a week.  I also try to watch my portions- I have learned that I hate being too full-its miserable.....so why do I keep eating??? I have quit forcing myself to "clear" my plate like my parents told me to, in the end you are only costing yourself more in medical bills from being obese then what you throw away in food.....

I want to look good, but I also want to look like a woman.  I am so glad that women like Marilyn Monroe and Beyonce' make it so beautiful to have curves and put out that image.  I have been watching this HBO show called "Boardwalk Empire" I like the show because even though the women are on television they are also voluptuous.

Voluptuous does not mean fat either....It means pleasure, fullness of beauty......I get upset with the pressure that women have to maintain this fairytale body that you see on the magazines, I also get upset with women who don't work out and complain about how they look.  I don't like it when pregnant women or women who just had babies get down on themselves.  I don't like it when your job or your hobby requires you to be a certain number either.

My name is Tiffany A. Coussens, I have been skinny all my life.....until I was diagnosed with a Thyroid disorder that causes you to gain weight.  I was an elite athlete on the National Level and even when I was in the best shape of my life I still wasn't satisfied with what I saw in the mirror......

My point is that if I make good food choices most of the time, if I limit my portions, I exercise and I challenge myself when I exercise (most people don't push themselves past their comfort level), then I should be happy with what I have...........I don't want to show up at my funeral in perfect condition I want to enjoy life......because it only happens once.....**

The Way to a Man's Heart.....**

I don't know about you- but my LEGS is a snob when it comes to meal time.  What I mean by that is he likes Gourmet Meals- I call them fancy- and he needs regular feeding otherwise he becomes totally grumpy......What I mean by fancy is that PB & J won't cut it- he likes hot lunch with all the condiments.  

I owe this quick fix to my dilemma to my little Sissy Megs.  

BBQ Chicken and Coleslaw Sandwhich

What you will need:

Kaiser Hamburger Buns
Cole Slaw (you can make your own or get one of those pre-made kits at the store)
BBQ Sauce
Chicken


Megan used a rotisserie chicken from Fred Meyer, but since the commissary doesn't have those- I just marinated a couple of boneless skinless chicken breasts in one of those Weber Grill Mates, using mesquite or brown sugar a flavor that will go good with BBQ sauce.

I grilled up the chicken and then shredded it and put it in a bowl with BBQ sauce to marinate for awhile.

Then I made up the Cole Slaw with one of those pre-made kits.  I toasted the bun.  Then I put it all together I put the chicken on first then the coleslaw on the bun = A HAPPY HUSBAND!!!!

This is a quick meal if you have kids, or people coming over for lunch.  It can be eaten cold or hot- so it can be packed in a lunch as well.........

Thank you Megan!!!

Nutty

LEGS AND ARMS @ Cotton Field 102410

Legs and I have had the worst allergies lately......my throat has been dry, my asthma has been acting up, we wake up blowing our noses, sniffling and sneezing all day!!! 

The cause: PEANUTS.  Peanuts are farmed on nearly 200,000 acres of Southern Alabama.  Alabama ranks 3rd in the United States producing about 400 million pounds of peanuts every year and contributing to a very large part of the economy down here.  Every year in Dothan (about 30 minutes from Enterprise) they have a large peanut festival attracting tourist from all over.

Farmers faced several problems after the Civil War that made cotton a challenge and the peanut a better option.  The depleted nutrients in the soil and the ravaging effects of the Boll Weevil devastated cotton production in this area.  Peanuts grow best in warm, subtropical climates and in sandy, well-drained chalky soils such as those found in Southern Alabama.

The Boll Weevil is a big trademark down here.  In fact, in downtown Enterprise there is a monument of the Boll Weevil.  It stands as the WORLD's ONLY monument built to honor an agricultural pest! Isn't that nutty!?!**


 

Its a Dog eat Dog world

Every weekend LEGS and I get excited because all week long we want to hang out and spend time together- then we him and haw, argue, discuss, and debate about we are going to do so long that we wasted hours of quality time together drinking coffee on our computers.......

Finally after spending hours in bed- we got up and took the dogs for a romp in this drainage sand pit thingy we found in our neighborhood in the middle of the woods.  Jake takes a dump on  a hill, and Chris says "Jake!- Man...don't you know shit rolls down hill!?!" Lolz......

We went to the Good Will store today to put the finishing touches on our Halloween Costumes.  Who ever knew thrift stores could be so interesting? My Mommy took me once to Value Village (our thrift store in AK) for school clothes shopping one year, and I have been to them before for High School spirit days......But today it was like a whole new experience- maybe its living in the South, but I found it to be engaging to think how much stuff we have that probably ends up in these places.  Things that we wore for a special occasion, or things we saw everyday until we decided to get rid of it......a necklace we wore everyday, or our favorite sweater.............

Makes you wonder why do we acquire so much stuff, why do we get rid of it? What would you take if your house was on fire??? OR if you were going to move to EUROPE Lolz..........**

Then I had to get a hold of myself- before I turned into my numerous family members with hoarding tendencies......although I fear it was the beginning of a new addiction.....

Entry from 102210 "Connections...."

Yesterday I was invited to "Girlz Lunch" for the first time by my friend Flora.  LEGS (aka Chris) and I were walking the dogs as Flora drove by.  Flora works at the gym on Post- everybody knows how much time I spend at the gym right? Its like my job to workout- Flora also lives in our neighborhood- don't you just love that name Flora? So she stopped as she drove by- and the first thing I did was critically examine what she was wearing from head to toe- I probably looked like a pervert eye balling her the way I was....but I was so nervous about fitting in and making a good impression at the lunch I couldn't help it.  

It was such an incredible experience.....when the girls first came in-because I was of course- awkwardly early-they all gave me hugs.  I was thinking yesterday that I get hugs from LEGS all the time- but I never get hugs from my family and it made me sad.......its obvious to me that making that connection with people is so important and receiving three hugs from three different girls had the strange familiarity of receiving hugs from my three little sisters.....how come I had never realized this before???  A typical you don't know what your missing until its gone........

I just watched the movie "Anne Frank" and I was thinking how amazing that these people had to live in such a small place and had to be quiet for most of the day so as to not give up there hiding place.  They probably had whole conversations with just their eyes.......and to make connections that are meaningful has become so difficult these days......**



 

Entry from 102110 Wir Werden Deutschland

WOW...........We Got Germany!!! I still cannot believe that we are moving to Germany- I am so excited and yet terrified all at the same time.  Chris was selected to go to Germany because of how well he did in PRIMARY FLIGHT SCHOOL- which was the very very beginning of his flight school career.  Everybody should be very excited and proud of Chris- he is an excellent student and Aviator and this assignment demonstrates his man among men status.  He just passed "the Bag" in the Apache course which is the toughest part of the Apache training, I made him Red Velvet cupcakes with Cream Cheese Frosting to celebrate.  

I delivered some of the cupcakes to our next door neighbors.  The Daddy is deployed to Afghanistan and the teenage girl Vanessa answered the door when she saw the cupcakes she lit up and gave me the biggest hug.  Next we delivered some to our neighbors down the street Erica and Dan- they just had a baby girl Kembree- she has been crying non-stop.  It felt good to deliver happiness around the neighborhood my soul was sparkling.......

ILLesheim is a small German town located about 45 minutes for Nuernberg and 2 hours from Frankfurt.  It has about 4000 people in it, which is about 1000 less than Enterprise, AL.  So its definitely out in the country.  The good news is it serves as a market center for the surrounding agricultural area that is similar to a small farming community in the Mid-west in the US.  Its people are rugged individualists such as those who are found in the New England states. I think this will be a good fit for Chris and I.

We watched the movie "Away We Go" its a B rate Indie film with lots of good actors in it.  It won a lot of awards, its about a pregnant couple trying to find where they should live.  Its a lot like Sideways or Little Miss Sunshine- that dark humor- anyways, we laughed our asses off!!! Chris was doing his high pitched girl laugh out loud- which was making me laugh even harder.......why don't they make more quality movies like that? 

Entry from 102010 "They say......."

They say we never stop learning in life and I shall hope to never stop learning because life would be dull and boring if we did not continue to learn and more importantly be surprised.....I read somewhere the other day that you should scare yourself everyday- because fear means your alive and because its exhilerating! Of course I agree and am frightened and excited about living another country for three years and during some periods- alone.  I can only think what my father must have felt and how we could not have understood his plight at this point when he went to Norway to work..........

Just when I think I have people figured out, just when I have given up on people, just when I have become disenchanted with with goings on in the family, relationships, friendships because of how complicated and very tiresome they can be- I am delightfully surprised and utterly inspired..........by people showing up in the clutch.....

Lord knows I have been disappointed, let down and down right angered by my baby sisters Kayla's mistakes, decisions and choices in life.  It has divided the family, strained relationships and tried patience.  Today I spoke to her on the phone from a humble and needy position which is quite the role reversal......I needed her to agree and commit to take Clancy.

Clancy is a beautiful and loyal dog that has been with Chris and I since first go together- he very much symbolizes our relationship.  He has been through deployments, moves and cross country moves, climate changes, we have added dogs to his pack, he is 10 years old he gets stiff when we work him too hard, he has started to need help getting in the car- but still a young dog for periods during the day- still loyal and beautiful and caring.  Kayla said she wanted to help me, and she acknowledged we have Clancy and Jake because of her.  I cannot tell you how much this means to me- it makes me tear I as I write- I had no idea I meant that much to her, and although I want to be ready for disappointment- I want to play it safe and wait guardedly for a change of mind- I must simply have faith- and it feels good to believe in her and love her again- (damn Kayla don't make me wrong about this lol)

I also spoke with Rachel and Megan because they would both share in the responsibility of take on Jake.  Jake is a special needs dog- he is great in the house but is socially retarded with other dogs (not Bubbles or Snickers of course) If they could not take Jake I would probably have to put him down- which let's face it Jake has been on the chopping block since he was born- in fact Chris and I save him once from the pound.......Jake has always been my guardian- in the liquor store I am sure he saved me many times from being robbed, raped, and victimized otherwise- he is very protective and should be thought of as such......

These dogs have been like our children- they have been there every single day- during times of pain, sadness, happiness and they have become some of my best companions and I hope and pray they are regarded as such in your care- as I know they will be.....

The phone conversations that I have had with family members and friends lately has been so refreshing and so exciting that I cannot thank you all enough for surprising me- that yes people let you down, you lose touch, you have feelings that cloud your judgment, you perception and their perception of the same picture is distorted for whatever reason........I have been let down by different people in different roles in my life- 

But today I have charity in my heart again- I will remember this day for a long time and possibly forever- so thank you for restoring my faith........

How Ironic.....

Well I have decided to start and blog, I know I can't even believe I am doing it.  Its just so Ironic because I used to think Blogs were weird and stupid- I mean who really cares what these people are saying anyways??? And are they that conceited and narcissistic that they believe people are going to follow their lives? What makes them so special??? I have been encouraged by my Mommy and my husband and told by my Grams and my best friend that I am a good writer- especially in emails and letters......and that I should do something with it. I find that facebook isn't really cutting it for all the thoughts that I want to share with my family and friends especially since I am so far away from them.  

Its a risk that I am willing to take for no better reason then to amuse myself and hopefully you.......**