Insecurity**

We made kebabs last night for dinner last night, they are really good, healthy and easy to make....here is a picture....

I usually drizzle with Teriyaki sauce to make it tastier, but be careful the sodium quantity is ridiculous in most teriyaki sauces...And Pineapple and Onions are necessary, otherwise have fun!!!

I have been in a sh**ty mood all day.  Don't know why.....what do I have to be pi**y about? I have no job, no obligations.........but then I went to Yoga and I feel so much better....Everybody should do yoga its like a breath of fresh air......they say the balance exercises are like a neurological massage....I believe it.......

Even though people don't think so, I have a lot of insecurities.  

One of them is cooking.  I am actually terrified of it.  I once made an egg sandwich for LEGS and he ate one bite and with a disgusted face set the entire sandwich on the plate and never touched it again...I was mortified....It really hurt my feelings because it was something that I loved- My Daddy and I used to make them a lot when I was a kid..I mean how could he dislike something I loved so much.....And mayonnaise is good on everything right?

I really admire people who can really cook, like my Mother in Law Susan, or my Step Dad Mike they can cook really well and secretly they make me feel incompetent........This, and the egg sandwich disaster has made me avoid cooking until now......

Here it is my very first rump roast....people have been calling it Pot Roast all day.....no its RUMP roast...just because I like to say RUMP..RUMP...RUMP......in the sink waiting to die..........or be burned, scorched, ruined, and wasted by none other than ARMS....Anyways I made it in the crock pot that my Mema got me.......(Recipe Courtesy of Erica McGuinley, listed below)

rump roast (about 3 lbs)
baby carrots (I usually buy the bigger bag at the Commissary)
1 14.5 oz can diced tomatoes
2 cups beef broth
1 tsp rosemary
1 tsp thyme
1 tsp marjoram
1 cup red cooking wine
4 cloves garlic, crushed or sliced
1.8 oz package dry leek soup mix (I have been using Lipton's beefy onion soup mix because I couldn't find this one)
1 tbsp Worcestershire sauce

Cook for 9-11 hours....and it turned out great........ 

Somebody said on facebook today, that you don't get to choose your parents, or your siblings, or your children but you do get to choose your spouse so you better be sure you make the right decision...I couldn't agree more.........I am so lucky to have LEGS, sometimes I feel like we are too happy.  I worry that it will end badly because I couldn't possibly deserve such a great husband.......insecurity?
I am so insecure that when I talk to people I tend to look to the side or behind them.  It is so bad sometimes that people will look behind them and say "I thought something was behind me..." I know this "scientifically" means that I am "lying." But I am not......I am just worried about what your reaction might be to my honesty..... insecurity?
I also have an insecurity about my appearance and weight.  I like having curves, but why can't the fat congregate in more desirable area's? I often wonder if I have such a hard time with my weight because of my Hypothyroidism or I just have a problem with my weight- what comes first the chicken or the egg? Do I have to watch what I eat because of my disease? Or did I just grow into a woman?
When LEGS gets home.....I am like "HEY! HOW YA BEEN? WHAT ARE YOU DOING? WHAT DO YOU KNOW, WHO DID YOU SEE? HOW WAS FLYING? DID YOU FLY GOOD? " Poor thing I completely bombard him.......
Tonight, he went through a special round of attack- "DO YOU LIKE THE ROAST, IS IT GOOD, DID I OVER COOK IT?"
Can I tell you a secret? If you read my blog you will know.  Yesterday I noticed my phone said 'I had service' where I normally don't in my house.  I kept thinking it was an evil trick and as soon as I made a call the 'service' would disappear.........This morning I woke up to my customary cup of coffee courtesy of LEGS, and noticed I had a 3G on my iPhone.  I thought to myself that I needed more coffee.  About 10 minutes later I still noticed the 3G was STILL on my phone.  I said "LEGS! I have 3G on my phone!!!" He said "I have 3G on my phone!!! And 4 bars!!!!" 
What this means is I now have decent service IN MY HOUSE...... I guess AT&T bought out ALTELL's towers..........I have been thinking all day how miserable I was when I got down here because I didn't have good phone service.....and today I contemplated even telling people I did have good service NOW for fear they will clutter up my life with misery because I have been so happy.......call me if you NEED me.....and DEFINITELY CALL ME IF YOUR HAPPY!!!!

Just another day in the life of an unlikely military wife......**